ANOTHER SATURDAY NIGHT

PLUS POINTS: Spending four to five hours on the windward beach of Oahu
Chasing your granddaughter in and out of the waves
Watching your grandson boogie-boarding further out than you could ever have imagined he would go
Sitting scrunched between a three year old and a six year old in the back seat of a mini-van

MINUS POINTS: 17 Diet Cokes
14 carrot-bread-type muffins with some incredible frosting on top
Four and a half pieces of Papa John pizza
One very large bowl of chocolate mint ice cream eaten in front of the television
(FYI here - food eaten while watching television adds 45% more calories while food eaten while reading a book takes away 35% of the calories and food eaten outside is calorie-free)

TOTAL POINTS: 0

SITTIN' ON THE DOCK OF THE BAY

Things that allow you to burn more calories while away from home:

- Having a three-year old granddaughter who simply does NOT stop moving for 14 hours of the day.

- A six-year grandson who always wants to show you something that is someplace other than where you are at the moment.

- Breathing in clean clear air straight off the ocean.

- Eating dinner only after smelling it for the previous two hours.

- And last (but by no means the least) being too embarrassed to hunt through your daughter's cabinets to see if there is 'anything else' to nibble on.

So far today:

Yogurt

Fiber One

A banana

Some chocolate

Sitting on the front porch reading "The Glass Castle"

TOTAL: Contentment.

PLUS AND MINUS

A Diet Coke is -4 points.
A regular Coke is -3 points.
A Diet Dr. Pepper is -8 points.
A Caffeine-Free Diet Dr. Pepper is -22 points.

Chocolate is +1 point.
Ice cream is +18 points.
Yogurt is - 18 points
(so if you eat them within three hours of each other, they cancel themselves out)

Milk is -8 points (calcium and all that).
Bottled Water is -18 points.
Tap Water is -12 points.

Sugar-Free Bubble Gum is -15 points.
Regular Bubble Gum is -5 points.
Sugar-Free Trident Spearmint is o points.

Cleaning the kitchen is -10 points.
Cleaning the bathroom is -40 points.
Cleaning the cat box is -12 points.

Falling asleep on the couch is +12 points.
Falling asleep in your bed with the lights out is -7 points.
Falling asleep in church is +132 points plus the chance of being struck by a lightening bolt.

So today:
- 4
-8
-18
+1
-12
-12
+132
______
+139