LATIN EMOVERE -"MOVE OUT, REMOVE"

e·mo·tion [i mṓsh'n] - n
1. heightened feeling: a strong feeling about somebody or something
2. agitation caused by strong feelings: agitation or disturbance caused by strong feelings

The feelings of distress, whether new or chronic, would reach a point where eating was a suitable and temporary relief from their pain; eating and its preparation provided the troubled person with a distraction, a reward, gratification, comfort or a sense of being loved (http://www.davedraper.com/article-190-obesity.html)

Eating disorder behaviors are very effective ways of altering emotions and emotional awareness. Thus, the eating disorder becomes more important or more valuable because it becomes a resource to help patients avoid or minimize their emotions. Many patients have commented to me that the one thing they like most about their eating disorders is their ability to alter their emotions through the behavior. (http://www.eatingdisordersblogs.com/your_role/2009/03/emotions-and-eating-disorders.html)

Yogurt - 150
Dairy Queen (again, with a gun pointed at my head) - 329
Grilled Cheese (I gotta stop this, don't I?) - 670
Manwich - 355

TOTAL - 1,504

FOILED AGAIN

This evening, the weather was spooky enough that I figured it would be safer to take the dogs for the walk instead of the horses.

Let me explain.

When the horses and I go for a walk, as we did this morning before it got too hot, we have one goal and one goal only.

Grass.

Both horses are perfectly happy to walk along with me for almost any distance I want as long as we end the walk with at least ten minutes of them sinking their teeth into the slight growths of grass we have had after a pathetic beginning of our monsoon season.

Wait, I should clarify that as well.

Both horses are perfectly happy to DRAG ME ALONG WITH THEM for however long I can take it and then graze with me dragging THEM back home at the end.

This evening, with a thunderstorm teasing us with dark clouds and lightning strikes in Mexico, there couldn't be a guarantee that we could end up with grass in their chops.

So I took the dogs, figuring it would be much easier to turn around when and if necessary.

And it was.

I began walking down our driveway.... spotted a jogger coming down our dirt road, so turned left instead of right.

At the end of the road down right, spotted another person walking three dogs (three LARGE dogs) towards us - so turned around and went back.

Just got past the first road... begins to rain.

So listen, I tried to exercise, I did.

Today - Yogurt -- 150
Fiber One -- 60
Toast with Peanut Butter -- 130 + 376
One Frosty (care of my son - ain't he sweet?) -- 318
Yogurt -- 150

TOTAL -- 1184

ME OH MY

I was forced, yes, FORCED to eat a Denny's BLT and french fries, a Dairy Queen vanilla cone, and Applebee's oriental chicken wrap.

Life doesn't get much better than this... unless you are attempting to lose weight, that is.

THOSE WE DO NOT SPEAK OF

"Plump" used to be a compliment.

"Sunburnt" or "suntanned" was demeaning.

Showing your ankles was incredibly obscene.

Times have changed.

We pay good money to work off the excess weight we have gained from our sedentary lifestyles. We pay for tanning booths and bronzing lotions. And we show a whole lot more than just our ankles.

Today: Yogurt -- 150
Fiber One -- 60
Grilled Cheese Sandwich -- 670 (and if I'd known that, I wouldn't have made one!)
Bill's Hamburger Soup -- 350 (guessimate)
Popcorn -- 200

TOTAL -- 1,430

It may be easier to simply invent a time machine and go back to the 1830's when I would be plump, pale and modest.

I HAVE MET THE ENEMY AND HE IS US

Yesterday was one of those (for me) major AND YET recurring moments of "a-HA!"

Tears were pouring down my face because of an emotional three-way crash at 110 mph of eight semis - and man, if I had succumbed, I would have immediately eaten 4.6 tons of comfort food (as well as use up six boxes of Puffs Plus) without pausing for breath (no pun intended).

But I didn't.

I even went to bed pretty hungry.

Which is probably why I didn't sleep much, and have been unreasonably grumpy most of the day.

But I did NOT give it.

Five brownie points, at least, for this major victory.